lâcher prise

September 24th, 2006

It means let go in French. It’s on page seventeen of the program opposite its English counterpart. I wish I could learn to let go more often. Free the terrible thoughts that incessantly fill my mind.

Today wasn’t such a hot day, obviously. I woke up at 9AM, did a few touch ups on my site, and laid back down for the better part of the day. One might think having the means to do whatever one pleases, say go see a Cirque du Soleil show, might brighten one’s day. Not for me. I almost didn’t go. Twice during the day I had made my mind up that I was going to forego my purchase and stay home. I’m glad I didn’t. However I doubt my life would be any different at this very moment had I not gone. [sans the pretty book full of neat pictures and fancy sayings that cost twenty American dollars]

Sitting alone in an arena with the potential to seat thousands sent a very eerie feeling down my spine. I had to hold back tears at one point. Not the best frame of mind to be in whilst waiting to see what’s likely to be a great show, now is it? I know. When the remake of Patzivota came on, tears definately swelled in the creases of my eyes. I was laughing by the finale, but the sadness that often conceals my happy thoughts quickly ensued subsequent the close of the show. I wish I could let them go. I know it’s possible, for I’ve definately been joyful a time or two in the past. How could it be that there are over six billion people on earth and I still feel so alone?

Oh well. I’m going to goto sleep now. Nothing dreadful happens in my sleep. Here are some pictures from the show. The seat I had was spectacular. Center court, eye level with the stage. I’ll write more about the show when I no longer feel the urge to let go…

Entry Filed under: Life